While drafting a bucket list, I realized I’d hadn’t seen the opposite list: Things I Have Never Done And Will Never Do. Here is my first draft.
Get a tattoo or piercing. I have enough holes in my head and spots on my skin.
Knowingly cross an international border with contraband. That’s more kinds of stupid than I can count.
Smoke anything that does not contain THC. I’m debating putting a trip to the Netherlands on my bucket list while I still have functioning brain cells to kill.
Run with the bulls in Pamplona. The other runners would terrify me.
Jump out of a perfectly good airplane. I can feel the effects of gravity from a non lethal height, thank you very much.
Stand in line overnight for a new product from Apple. Though I may reconsider if they introduce pleasure androids.
Buy a pair of Crocs. I can’t imagine ever needing a pair of dedicated gardening shoes.